Graduated

I guess it's time to update my blog.

A lot has happened.

I passed my professional examination. Which means my undergraduate studies has finally come to an end.

Frankly, I don't know how I survived the ordeal prior to the exam, a yardstick that would determine whether or not I was eligible for the title my degree confers. It doesn't take into consideration the previous glories you've had. If you fail to score above the passing mark, you'll have to resit in 6 months.

For the first time in 5 years, I cried during the examination period. I cried after talking to my mom on the phone too. I'm not intelligent. And the worst thing, I hadn't really worked hard enough. Hence, it's really stressful.

The vice chancellor was invited to to announce the names of those who made it through. Initially, I didn't understand why they had to make it so grand. I was so worried of being in the list of students who failed. I just couldn't bear the thought of myself enduring the embarrassment alone like a defeated warrior while others rejoiced over their respective victory. You wouldn't call me kiasu, if you could understand the helplessness I felt.

The moment my name was announced, my tears began to flow. With the immediate thought that crying publicly wasn't really congruent with the masculinity that I'd always tried to feign, I rushed to the toilet. I returned, only to realize that many of my comrades were eye-misted too and hugging one another.

I felt a sense of achievement though it was only the beginning of the career I chose.

And I finally understood why they had to make it grand.