Tuesday, January 27, 2009

CNY

Ate a lot. Drank a lot. Gambled a lot. Met many old friends.

Chinese New Year is definitely one of the periods of time in the year during which I feel most sinful.

I can literally feel my tummy enlarging.

CNY is also when you catch up on the latest events in others' lives. I noticed that those who made fun of me when I was a fat boy had now become gigantic and fat themselves. I greeted them with a sadistic grin when they said hi.

Besides, just like what I'd anticipated, I still am not spared from the inevitable onslaught of questions on why I'm not having a girlfriend yet. Everyone is wondering and curious. And I have to come up with the same old lame excuses and fabricated information as far as my love life is concerned.

The hardest part is still my mom. I just feel very sorry.

Everyone seems to have found a boyfriend or girlfriend. My friends. My cousins. And if I'm not mistaken my biological brother, Derek, who's 8 years older than me, is going to get married in half a year's time.

For the first time in my life, I feel very incompetent being gay. Really. Extremely aware though I am of the need to be happy and optimistic, inferiority always succeeds in finding a way to enshroud my soul, no matter how hard I defend myself against it.

12 comments:

  1. will it help if u'd hv a bf to show-off during family reunions? ;)

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  2. no asked me during cny! so that means ur family cares about u! =(

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  3. CIS! What's all this feelings of inferiority! It's normal for medical students, straight or gay, not to have found a partner. Moreover, finding meaningful relationships among gay men is more difficult than for the straights. You're still young, so concentrate on your studies and get a good job first!

    ekkon: Maybe that's cos you're obviously ghey? :P

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  4. Yeah... I guess most of us who are still single by the age of 22 - 25 will get questioned by the elderly as to why we don't have girlfriends. And I think this issue will continue so long as we remain single.

    I got the exact same situation as you this year and I understand your feeling of incompetence. Sigh...

    Anyway, happy cny and all the best in your studies.

    D

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  5. omg joe...didn't know you're an avid fan of DotA.....i forgot what's the name for the avatar that u used [maybe coz i hate using him....useless sometimes.... dragon and man right? lol]

    anyway.....

    i can diagnose you as having a classic "i'm tired of being a single, i wanna a boyfriend now!!!" syndrome....

    so hard meh to find a guy that you like in your batch? or your senior or your junior?

    idk. lotsa ppl [excluding me of course] find their love life outside their mad/med life.

    so, maybe it's time to pay the pubs/gay clubs a try then? lol

    p/s: next time, just bring someone as a fake bf la....make sure he's gorgeous though. that'll shut everyone up XD

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  6. aiyar dis is new age. 21st century deh. its normal to be single. u wana get married, make sure u got $. else later u got prbs later. its easy to get into marriage wagon. wat they say is easy. but its u who wud married and live a totally different life esp with some1 else everyday. think twice. nobody can force u. u can tell them off. marriage is not everyday bed of roses.

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  7. Always tough showing up for CNY these days with everyone pelting us with questions :) Hang on, yeah! Just enjoy being with the relatives.

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  8. Lol I'm never asked questions like this even during CNY. No one cares whether I have a gf or not :(. Perhaps looking at it from another way, people are merely concerned about you. :)

    @raeshad
    hi there, dragon and man would probably be Dragon Knight, joe's avatar is another hero. :)

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  9. my mum asked who was it that i was talking to in the middle of the night when we were watching ah long pte ltd... and i said it was a he. her eyes wide open.

    "colleague lah!"

    "oh not girlfriend ah?"

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  10. I think its more like a totally Chinese culture thing. Everytime you see a relative, its a question that you must ask;

    Do you have a boy/girl friend?
    When are you getting married?
    When are you having children?

    Its so typical chinese! That like when you go to a clinic to see the doctor and when someone you know sees you and they ask you "here to see the doctor?"

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