As it squeezes out....

I've been very busy lately.

For yesterday alone, I witnessed how a Pap's smear was done, 4 spontaneous vaginal deliveries (SVD) and 3 episiotomies and their subseqent repair as well as an ultrasound scan of an obstetric patient with antepartum haemorrhage. I did a vaginal examination and 2 venipunctures, one of which wasn't very successful. A lot of pussies, and blood.

It's the 4th day today. Our knowlegde regarding basic patient care is very limited, let alone obstetrics and gynaecology. Sometimes, I need to poke the one of the veins in the antecubital fossa several times just in order to take a blood sample. I don't know where the cervix is when my fingers are already 20 seconds in the vagina. I stammer when the medical officers bombard me with questions. I don't really know how to measure the symphysis-fundal height (SFH). I feel lost when palpating the fetal poles. I don't know what I'm looking at during an ultrasound scan. Feel stupid at times.

Watching babies being delivered, nonetheless, is something I find very rewarding. It kind of phagocytoses all these feelings of stupidity which seem to undermine my confidence and self-esteem when I'm with my brilliant coursemates.

The labour pain that a mother, especially a primipara, has to undergo is immense and indescribable. There's plenty of fresh blood and bodily fluid here and there. In an event of difficult birth, an episiotomy has to be carried out and when the incision into the perineum is done, the pain looks so excruciating that it sends shivers down my spine. I do count my blessings for being born with a dick and not having to experience child birth in my current life.

But then, the moment the baby squeezes its way out of the birth canal, my heart melts, like the butter under the sun. The staff nurses will insert tubes, which they call suction catheters, into the its airway. And then, the baby, so fragile but full of live, cries incessantly. Feels like it has been held captive in the womb for an entire 9 months and is eventually set free and comes alive.

I almost shed tears the first time I observed an SVD. I watched in awe, with the zest of a 3-year-old who sees an ice-cream for the first time. My feelings were a mixture of satisfaction, amazement and pleasure.

We're required to perform at least 5 vaginal deliveries in this posting under supervision. And I really do look forward to it. Hehe.